The Truth

It’s been a while, have you missed me? Well, I’ve been pretty busy over the last little while and haven’t had much down time – oh, that’s too bad, you really should take some time for yourself. Not really, you see, every minute of every day is for myself. My work and training is a great source of satisfaction for me. For me, understanding that each day, each activity is my own personal choice, leaves me both responsible for, and happy with, every choice that I make.

Three Rs:

• Respect for self
• Respect for others
• Responsibility for all my thoughts and actions

Anyhow, it’s been a pretty satisfying period so far over the last few weeks. Quite busy and a few times I had to buckle down. Kind of interesting to see my response when I was challenged to raise my game. I had wondered if high productivity would ever be possible again – turns out that my productivity remains. Even better, my effectiveness has been enhanced with the passage of time.

Read an interesting book recently, J. Krishnamurti, Think of These Things. JK comes up with some very interesting insights into human nature and the fundamental nature of things. If you read the book then you might see that I have been scratching the surface of many of JK’s insights – he’s an amazing guy.

Anyhow, it was neat to read about another example about how one man’s view of the truth matches the stories experienced by so many others. The main difference in Krishnanurti’s experience is that he doesn’t espouse any particular path, belief system or other dogma. I found his thoughts on truth particularly interesting. His view is that there is a universal truth within us all – we simply need to quiet our mind for this truth to become apparent. He also talks quite a bit about the only real truth being what we experience for ourselves and that it is not possible to follow anything, anyone, any creed to a truth… truth is a pathless land… get it?

From time to time I receive advice from folks encouraging me to follow their path, their dogma, their truth, their God - these folks encourage me to look into their path as it is the one true path. These notes make me smile… how can you know the right path for me if you don’t even know me. Do you think that I would be a better person if I followed your path? Most the people I see following any path (money, God, sex, athletics, alcohol, whatever) don’t strike me as particularly radiant in truth, happiness and love. I’m feeling pretty good these days, will your path make me feel even better? Will it make me a “better” person? Will it make you feel like a better person (having straightened me out)? Are you sure that I need to be straightened? Who says so?

Perhaps you were prompted to drop me a line because my writing touched something inside you – perhaps your feelings were driven by the Truth inside you?

Can any belief system that is based on a truth outside of one’s self, one’s actual experience be truly strong. If your Truth/God/Path is so strong then why aren’t you happier? Why aren’t you filled with love and happiness?

What is it that creates conflict in our lives, in our societies? Some might blame it on external influences – JK has an interesting observation that the conflict evident in our societies is merely a reflection of the internal conflict within us. By resolving our internal conflicts, we will be able to better face, and eventually change, the external conflicts in our world.

I’ve certainly found that as I have made progress calming the noise inside my own mind:

• many conflicts cease as they were creations of my mind;
• I am able to see beyond words, I can understand what you mean (rather than what you say);
• the clarity of my thoughts has increased markedly.

However, to get these improvements, I needed to free up some space inside my head. It’s a ongoing tough project of mind to do my best to free up space.

So many of my friends believe passionately that their God will deliver them to happiness. So they buckle down and work devoutly towards their God. But what is your God? Is it a book? Is it a guru? Is it a prophet, long since departed? Is it a race, a fictional promised land of heat and lava? Is it competition, money, acquiring goods? What is your belief system? What is your truth? Do you follow the laws, ideals, dogma of another? How can you be sure of their truth? Has it brought you stability, happiness, goodness, satisfaction? If you are deeply satisfied with your life then perhaps the answers to the questions are beside the point. If you are looking for some increased satisfaction then a good place to start would be your current beliefs.

Perhaps there is something deeper beyond the experience that you have been conditioned to believe? Beyond the patterns that your parents, teachers and society have brought you to believe? Something that might give you the tranquility that you long to experience? That you may have known in a moment of grace, of beauty or quiet reflection?

You keep believing and believing but the more you believe, the more you try to be devout/fast/acceptable/good/right/honest… does it get you anywhere? Does it bring you lasting peace?

Think about the people that you have met in your life that are truly happy, deeply happy – what common characteristics do they have? Think about the moments of your own life when you have experienced calm, experienced peace? What do these moments have in common? For me, these moments give me insights into my own peace, my own truth.

I had a good buddy tell me the other day… “look dude, it’s great that you have found your inner peace, the meaning in your life but what the hell does that do for me?!” My first thought was “I don’t know what it does for you, but that’s one of the nicest things that anyone has said to me in a while. You really are a good friend”. Of course that didn’t do much for my pal. Or maybe it did. I’m not sure. I’m not sure of a whole lot these days – but the few things that I am sure about… I am increasingly sure of.

When we quiet our minds, we are able to see beyond mere words and into the heart of the people that are talking to us. Truth lies in the heart, not in words. When you know that a person has love in their heart, when you really know it – can anything that they say hurt you? Can anything they say be anything other than an expression of their love or a reflection of the fear that their loves brings to their ego? I always hope people forgive me when my mind gets out of control – for the people I meet, I also try to forgive them for the problems of their mind.

Have you ever experienced the fear (that uncontrolled sensation) that our minds create when we start to head towards the Truth?

Have you ever found that your mind feels most secure when it has power over, or dependence from, another?

Have you explored or considered why the above happens?

The ego feeds on the energy of others. I wonder if it is possible for us to generate energy from within ourselves? Of course it is – when people find their truth, their vocation – the energy always appears. Think about it in your own life – think about a situation where you really wanted something. When you have something that you truly want to do, truly want to learn, you are alive, you are full of the energy required for the task. It’s a shame that so many of us find the source of our energy in gods that eventually prove to be false. But at least we have energy, without energy we are dead.

Most of our minds are not set-up for dealing with a situation when we find ourselves drawn towards an individual or a concept that wants nothing from us except the pleasure that comes from being with us (or even simply the pleasure of being, period). The ego tries to find an angle, a hook to make that person dependant on us (employment, marriage, commitment, sexual gratification, money). But ALL of these things are pointless – all we really want is merely to experience the energy, the truth, the love that comes from being with that person. All the hooks in the world can’t create that energy – it comes from within that person. Create restrictions, blockages, entrapment and you stifle the very energy that you crave so much.

Does your mind like it when the object of your love reflects your love on to others? Or does your mind try to possess that love, lock it up, grab it just for itself. Does your mind feel cheated when another absorbs your love, magnifies it and passes it along to the world? Love, like information, has the most value when it is shared.

“But you don’t need me. What will I do it you leave/fire/foresake me?”

If your happiness depends on the approval/love/respect/admiration of another then is it strong? Is it solid? Because the other will change/leave/die. Maybe not today but eventually and what will you do then? True strength can only arise within. If we love others merely so that they love us in return, then aren’t we really engaged in a form of psychological barter? Shopping at the market for love? But it isn’t love, it’s ego food.

“What will happen if I lose my partner/money/job/house/speed?”

Does your sense of self depend on these externals? You’ve been worrying about that for years, perhaps this is just the opportunity you need to find some truth beyond the gods that have yet to deliver you to happiness and fullfilment.

“What if I get old/slow/ugly?”

You will – get over it. Fear and denial make the most beautiful creature ugly before it’s time. Love and happiness can make anyone radiant for their entire life.

You don’t need ownership, you need love and the easiest way to get love is to give it.

Do you really understand the motivations of your mind, the sources of the beliefs that we take for granted? Have you challenged “why” you hold onto your beliefs so tightly? Are they a source of joy for you?

Do people with honesty, love and integrity in their hearts need laws, dogma, rituals and the advice of others to find truth and happiness? Will these rituals that you propose for me, make me a better person? Will they increase my ability to love you? For it is really love that drives us all.

So many questions to consider... all leading back to your one truth and I hope that all of you find it soon and may your lives be better because of it.

The truth is out there,

Yuen

The Card

"For most of life, nothing wonderful happens. If you don't enjoy getting up and working and finishing your work and sitting down to a meal with family or friends, then the chances are that you're not going to be very happy. If someone bases his happiness or unhappiness on major events like a great new job, huge amounts of money, a flawlessly happy marriage or a trip to Paris, that person isn't going to be happy much of the time. If, on the other hand, happiness depends on a good breakfast, flowers in the yard, a drink or a nap, then we are more likely to live with quite a bit of happiness." -Andy Rooney

As a young boy back in high school that was one of the quotes that I came across on one of my usual afternoons spent going through books. Amazingly someone had left one of those "pick me up" type of card things around the sports section. Back then I never really understood its meaning but now..all I can say is.. Whoever that person was, I thank you.

In my life, I have always had a tendency (a desire) to be different. I don't know why. Now that I "am different" I can see that a better way of looking at it would have been just to listen to my heart. Maybe my heart will tell me to be different but maybe my heart would be happy to do something "normal". I doubt that I will ever have a "normal" life based on prior experience but you never know. Without a doubt, following a path that brings happiness -- that is the path less traveled. We need only look around in the major cities of the world or pick up a newspaper to see that.

Still, it is kind of funny in that when I was unsatisfied in my life, I always tended to meet other people who were unsatisfied. Even when I started to make this transition in my life, I seemed to still always come across people who were unsatisfied and seemed to be mixng with the same sort of people. So many years on from that day in the bookstore I realised that I am actually surrounded by people who are happy in their lives. The strange thing? More than half of them are the same people! Now did the world change completely since that day? I very much doubt that. However, I have changed and in changing I have either started attractive positive things in my life OR am now able to see the positive things that were always around me (or at least trying to). I bet it is a lot of both factors. I love that Andy Rooney quote. It's a keeper.

As to why I came up with this post, I was recently clearing out some things that I had in my wallet. And oddly enough, I found this forgotten card tucked away in some obsolete corner. The other interesting thing I found was a magnet that had the words "sadness flies away on the wings of time" on it. However, thats another story, for another day.. =)

Remember my friends, when you change, everything else in your life follows!

Yours sincerely,

Yuen

To Be Your Best!

My latest idea for the week is to share some of my favourite sayings and write what they mean to me. It's really a writing exercise for me. You may get something out of it - you may not!

I love short phrases. They can convey so much in so few words. By a mere suggestion, they open a series of paths to many different thoughts. Especially when you are prone to thinking about things for hours on end when your legs, heart and mind are engaged in a physical mantra (like cycling, perhaps).

"To be your best is to be good enough"

-Lao Tzu, Tao Te Ching-

Now, looking at that from a Western perspective, one might be tempted to think that Lao Tzu is saying that we should be satisfied with our current situation. Just try your best and you've done all that you can.

Lao Tzu also says, "To live until you die is to live long enough." It's this quote that led me to think about the first one in a different light. To really live your whole life, to have experienced as many different things as possible, to explore the limits of your body, mind and spirit - THAT is really living.

What I think Lao Tzu is telling me is that I should be trying to be my best at all times in all areas. Be my best. Previously, I have always tried to be the best. That leads to competition and a focus away from what really matters - self-knowledge, self-improvement. I have absolutely no chance of making any changes to the outside world unless I can make changes in myself. Buddha or Jesus (they are mixed in my head these days), talks about changes within leading changes without.

How can I be my best? I have no roadmap, I have no idea of my potential. I feel lost, with no direction. I search for structure - it's no secret that my training provides structure to my whole life. Take away that structure and I start to get highly uncomfortable. Oh, what to do!

Step back.

What is my goal? Best to keep it simple. Start by "living right" and then add "thinking right". What does that mean? For me, it means showing acceptance and kindness first to oneself and then to others.(something that I'm still learning about and find hard to do at times, as I tend to be self destructive)

I really think that acceptance could be the key to unlock happiness and release stress. If I fail I am human. I am still okay. If I make a complete mess of everything, then I am just like everyone else. We make constant errors and mistakes. To expect perfection and constant happiness is a delusion. Things just don't work that way. If I accept that things will tend to crater from time to time (hell, crater all the time), then I am going to be better prepared to deal with whatever rolls my way - ham sandwich or hand grenade!

Am I heading back towards, "just do your best"? Does this mean that nothing really matters? I don't think so. I think that after I have realised that I am flawed, but okay, the next step is to make a total commitment to constant improvement. So being my best is not perfection. Rather it is a total commitment to thinking, being and acting the best - today, right now, this minute.

Not sure if you can see the difference, but it is a major one for me. It is full of tremendous compassion to myself. I acknowledge that I am flawed, but commit to a constant attempt to be my best. My best may, or may not, measure up to your expectations of me. Your best may, or may not, measure up to my expectations of you. However, so long as I know in my heart that I am doing the absolute best I can - right now - there really is not a lot more I can be doing. Very relaxing.

This concept is really interesting to me because what it implies is that we are not on a journey. Rather, we are living right here, right now. Who we are and what we are is linked to the present moment - not a future destination, not what we have achieved in the past.

While "present living", for me, implies a life that is 100% consistent with Christian metaphysics, it is a huge break from much of Christian Dogma. In particular, Catholic Dogma has a huge focus on the sins of the past - both our own, and those of others. Likewise, the focus is normally on "good living" today in order to achieve heaven tomorrow. What if good living today leads to heaven today? And in view of it all, what does heaven mean to you? That is truly a message of hope.

Hope this post makes sense in helping you readers out there!

Yuen

1st thing of the day

Every morning as I clamber out of bed look at the door before walking out for the day, a paper I stuck on the door stares back at me that reads " To do your best, wherever you are, in whatever you do, with whatever you have, not what you wish you had".

An easy rule to write out, hard rule to live by.

However, I try my best too live by it (even though I fail sometimes) and I will continue trying to follow it on a day to day basis for the rest of my life.

So should you!

Yuen